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Sunday, January 18, 2015

Self Acceptance January 18,2015

As New Year's resolutions begin to fade, I start to think of all the "bad" things I've already done this year. I bought a huge macadamia nut cookie at the food store--it was shining at me at the checkout counter in its Saran-wrap luxury-- and ate it all before I finished putting the rest of my purchases away.
AND I just added a half teaspoon of "real" sugar to my Sunday morning coffee which prompted me to write this blog entry.
Last week was a challenging one for me, but it also had such goodness I have been heartened rather than its opposite. My friends know I am always willing to believe in people, some call me gullible I admit. I trust easily , but I get SO disappointed when my trust is misplaced and I get "taken."

I lose my self-respect, I doubt my decision-making skills, I cringe and want to curl up with a good mystery novel and hope the problem goes away, or that my emotional involvement dissipates to the level at which my head can function to extricate me from the ensuing mess.

This pattern can and does happen to many of us. We set goals, we slide back a bit which we accept until something else in our lives disappoints us and we slide into dysfunction. Whether we choose alcohol or pills or food to soothe our bruised selves, whether we hide from life and disconnect from friends or act out aggressively in this less than balanced state, we need to recognize what is happening inside ourselves.
Awareness has to come first.Reaching out to family and friends comes next. "Fessing up" and letting your world know what has happened isn't easy. It feels like admitting to failure, to naiveté at the least.
My son read the offending letter I received, my friend suggested an attorney who phoned me directly and even emailed me at 8:05 on a Friday evening and offered to read the material without charge!!

Don't let the winter doldrums get you down for long! 

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