Let's celebrate the day by doing a kindness for three people today, whether it's a visit or a telephone call to someone who is homebound or alone, time spent with a child or a senior, a smile and a donation to a homeless person on the street or a hug and a meaningful moment with someone you meet by chance during your hectic day. If it works, each of us will benefit from your generosity of spirit; then try being emotionally generous all week.
Today's NY Times Science News has an article titled "Tables Reserved For Only the Fittest." It describes multiple level independent living, assisted living and nursing care facilities that now limit who can eat in which dining rooms.
I have thought about this question for the past year from both sides of the dilemma. When my husband first entered the assisted living community, he had perfect table manners, used his utensils appropriately, but he did not converse with the others at his table, except for an occasional angry, inappropriate comment, addressed to another person at the table.The others at the table complained and Bob was moved to a two person table with another also combative, former soldier with whom it was thought he would be more compatible.
Bob, however, complained about the wheelchairs and walkers, not wanting to compare himself with "those old people." One day, he was so agitated when I walked in after lunch, Bob asked for my son Steve "who could fix this problem." He actually had a fist fight with his eating partner because, Bob said, "the man couldn't admit he was wrong." About what? Bob had no recollection. Only the emotion remained.
As Bob's eating skills declined, I felt he needed more personal assistance in the dining room. This was my first indication that Bob needed to move to a memory care unit. Now, he sits calmly with five others, his food is either soft or in small pieces removing the need for a knife, he eats whatever is served and he is content.
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